Troubleshooting by Imitation of Foreigners

“Don't be such a nuisance!” the fat boy said to him. “I don't care if they think you're like that Danish guy!”

August looked at him. “They all think it's like him, and not me, to actually be annoying everyone! Therefore I have to annoy people in order to stay into being like him! Besides I'm kind of a bit Danish too! I have heritage from Kile, and that's on the Danish Peninsula!”

“Oh, your a bit Danish are you! Well, here's Danish for you! I'm not anything close to being Danish, and I'm not anything like the kind of a guy you should be talking to about him! Besides I despise that Danish guy for having it he's revived as soon as they tell him he's about to be clever enough to seem more of an adequate guy than one would suppose him to be!”

“I think you're just simply too obnoxious to understand that I've got a point in presenting him as the guy who'd want to be admired for being nothing of the kind when they tell him he's insufficient for the situation of being a fellow who is just like I am - only I can't get at them by seeming inadequate just when I tell them! On the other hand, it's I who can get at them when they don't care to take advantage of that they seem to know better than to like him. I can only try to convince them that I'm rather good at saying to the people I have to do with that I am another type of fellow than they would expect me - or him - to be!”

“What do you mean that you simulate him at all if you're not able to do what you say he does?”

“What are you talking about?!”

“I mean the part about seeming inadequate for what they say while they're at saying it!”

“I can imitate it and thus be able to do that as well! I even triumph over him nowadays! Not even he can beat me, when I'm into my role of being him, at seeming inadequate for that contempt of theirs!”

The fat boy wondered, it seemed, about why he figured he was too smart to be imitating simply what he wanted for an idol, and too silly to believe it wasn't he who he was supposed to imitate for it. “How come,” he asked, after looking thoughtful for a while, “can't you feel up to imitating him as though they weren't what they thought they were, instead of just being a nuisance about how they seem to feel that you are totally not the guy they even more despise?”

“For the reasons I've talking to you about before, Gary! It's he and I who are despicable in those bullies' eyes! But it's not he and I who become despicable now that I can be obnoxious as were I that guy, and not me! I am not about my heritage for that, because I know many others from Denmark or northern Germany whom I feel assured now, that they wouldn't despise them! But I wouldn't feel assured about that had I not been imitating that Danish fellow!”

Gary looked at him and said: “Whatever you say, you're not really at all of my interest! Why the fuck do you come here and annoy me about it?! Why don't you feel that I could now go to those people and tell them that you're not Anders, but Ted?!”

“It's because you already are part of my imitation of that Anders! If you go to them and tell them you also tell on yourself! You seem to be the kind of fellow who would tell on me just to be getting away from them! And thereby I can blackmail you to the extent that I don't have to be the only guilty one in their eyes!”

“How can that be I who would have to be into imitation of anyone that has anything to do with him?!”

“It's because you actually seem to be his friend from Denmark, and you have been seeming to imitate him when you have been scolding me for seeming so ridiculous about being so to speak acrobatic and lissome! It's you who have been having them seem to have a problem with that fellow, and who have had one of them make the mistake of trampling on the wrong guys foot! Because Kaj, Ander's cousin, isn't a guy too easy to handle once he's been stood upon! ...”

“Oh, it's I is it!? Then what happened to that it's you who have been pretending it's I who should be seeming to be interested in hanging with them in the first place?! And what happened with that they don't see it in me to ever want to deal with them as were I of their kind, in even any kind of way!? What happened to that it's I and not you who would've been a guy totally unavailable for them, and even less I guy that they would have to even think about dealing with!?”

“It happened that I am a clever guy now, and I have fixed them so that they don't even think about the smaller details about all of this! And if you try to tell them about that part they will only laugh at you! Because I have an imitator of the guy who spoke to you in their presence who make you both seem to be ridiculous if they aught to get into details about such stuff!”

Gary looked a bit perplexed at this statement. Thinking about it, he said: “I will pretend to be that Danish fellow on one condition! It is that you seem to be loyal to him and not me, from now on! If you don't do that, I will tell them about it anyway, even if that makes them feel I as well as you are to blame!”

Two weeks later, it seemed that Anders' Danish friend had decided to visit Anders more frequently. To the extent they were not seen around in the town's northern pool club (where some of the bullies also hung around), they seemed mostly to be in a work shop, which was watched by a dog, who could become rather dangerous at times. To the extent there weren't any visitors to it, the work shop hardly seemed very interesting to most people. But for some, for example the town bullies, it seemed to be the high nest of their potential enemies. Thereby, tension rose in the town.

For years further on, the two seeming newcomers to town were into being at a party where they didn't know that two of the bullies had planned to kill them. This they did rather cleverly by setting them up with two women whom seemed a bit curious about the two guys. It became evident, after the two had died that to the extent the police became involved they would seem to have been rapists. Moreover, for the families of Ted and Gary, the clever game of seeming to be Danish persons had gone so far that the police would suspect them all to be so fraudulent that they would be considered enemies, perhaps, of the state! Thereby, the police was not a solution to their problem.

So, instead, they avenged them, using their rather smart skills of tending to seem to be others than they were, and thereby ordering murders as if were they some Danish people. To the extent this worked, they did manage to seem to be innocent of trying to get at those bullies. But it did not fake that they did not in themselves hold grudges against them and their people. Their grudges even showed so much that they eventually seemed to be helpers of those Danes. Thereby, although they were phony enough to get away in the short run, both Ted and his accomplices got nailed in the end just the same!