A Porn Writer

Adult (or at least semi-adult) story; follow the link if you want to read it anyway: A Porn Writer

The Conversation at the Next Table

In a small restaurant Tanya was waiting for three of her friends. She had arrived early and ordered some coffee. In the waiting for her friends she had emptied her cup, and now looked around for something to focus her attention on.

Sitting around a table next to hers, four people, two men and two women were sitting. They were seemingly friendly, but still sort of in a quarrel. Tanya decided to listen to them.

“Don't pretend,” one the men said, “that they didn't try to convince him that he should see himself as the ordinary kind of a fellow! It's not he but they who really tried to keep religion pure!”

“Then how come,” the other man asked, “they didn't try to listen to His teachings?”

As the discussion continued, it seemed evident to Tanya that the discussion was about religion. Probably, she figured, one man and one woman, of the four, were Catholics, and the other two were Jews. It seemed that they were discussing to which extent Christ had been good or not for the world.

Eventually, two of her three friends arrived. These two were a married couple. For some reason, just about then, Tanya also concluded that the four people consisted of two married couples.

Tanya looked at the husband of the couple with whom she was befriended. He and she had earlier flirted. But now she couldn't bring herself to it. It seemed, in a sense, to be because of some guilt she might have for that wife of his, but she knew, and her husband as well, that she also flirted around, and probably went to bed fairly easily with other fellows.

The wife looked at Tanya and said: “My brother will be a bit late, so if you don't mind, I propose that we all order lunch before he arrives. He asked me to order a stake for him.”

“Of course I don't mind that, Sally!” Tanya answered and waved to a waiter to come to their table. However he didn't. Then Sally waved towards another waiter who did go to their table and take orders.

After ordering, Sally and her husband began discussing their daughter, which Tanya didn't find interesting. She needed, she felt, to ponder upon if she was guilty of flirting with too many guys. Because she had, at all, flirted also with Sally's brother. But she couldn't quite come to any conclusion about it.

Eventually a waitress turned up and served two plates, and half a minutes later a waiter with the other two. Sally then said that she felt sure that her brother wouldn't mind if they began eating without him. This turned out to be true, after a few minutes, when he arrived, and said: “My, this is cozy!” and began eating. “There's nothing like good friends!” he continued, and seemed very much to mean it. The four of them began to chat and muse about this view on their friendship.

After a short while he added: “I feel that we all should be trying to have a little party, just for good friends! Perhaps like ten people or so can arrive!?”

Tanya looked at him. Somehow she felt awkward about being into mingling, so she answered: “I wonder what all the good friends will think of us if they don't have it in us to be seemingly into enough geniality or so, for us to be alternatives of being self-occupied!”

“What do you mean by that?!” Sally asked her.

“There's no absolute notion in me anymore, that I can feel genial about a party! There's somehow a notion of Christ, or perhaps it's Moses of something, in the atmosphere around us! It seems,” she said pointing, “that those four people are into religion in sense that makes one of us, at least, fed up with being into - ehm - vices.”

Sally's husband looked at Tanya and asked: “How in the world can you think that those four people can affect you, and then perhaps also us, about it!”

“Oh, I just felt,” Tanya answered, “that their discussion about Christ and whatever has weakened me, at least, against their opinions about sex and such! I feel also that perhaps each of you would also be affected had you happened to be listening to them - as I was when I was waiting for you!”

Sally and her husband looked at each other. “I feel,” he answered, “that what you say doesn't make sense, and that they are just four people talking!”

“I feel,” Sally said, “that whatever you're into of sex, you should not disturb our party with these feelings of that we have the same lusts for such adventures!”

Sally's brother said that he felt that Sally wasn't in her right mind.

The four people at the next table had stopped talking, and turned their heads towards Tanya's table. “I feel,” the woman whom Tanya guessed was Jewish said, “that whatever we have been discussing is actually none of your business, and that whatever you say, you don't have a point in hating us for that we have been trying to connect about our faiths!”

The man who seemed to be Catholic said immediately that he agreed, and soon after both the others at that table, and even Sally, her brother and her husband, too.

Tanya looked at them, first at her own friends, and then at the four people whom she was accusing. She felt that she was being badly treated as someone who didn't have a point. “I can,” she said, “see to it that you can understand that I feel that way because they were discussing it as though they had the only point in the universe! That is, both sides of the discussion were having an only point, so to speak!”

The man how seemed to be a Jew rose from his seat. “Look, lady!” he said. “We don't have to discuss this with you! And you didn't have to overhear our conversation in the first place!”

Tanya looked at him and answered: “How come you feel that superior without admitting tha tyou don't have a point, when all you do is quarrel with each other!?”

The seemingly Catholic man sighed to show resentment. He, but not the two ladies , began looking at Tanya with severe disgust and dismay over her seeming incapacity to see moral as adaptable to whatever religion the holders of it pertained to. The two ladies, meanwhile, looked at each other and seemed to agree that this was a lady whom they never wanted to be acquainted with.

Tanya looked at them. She felt that she ridiculed them enough by saying: “I don't feel threatened by you since you're into Christ or Abraham or something, and that you feel that they, those icons of yours, are, respectively, the antidote for everything that isn't of your peculiar faiths!”

Now the (seemingly) Catholic woman gave her an eye of dismay that was severely devastating to her self-security. Then, a moment later, she seemed very friendly, but scornfully into thinking she was supreme. Her (seemingly) Jewish friend said: “What do you think you are, discussing things like that when you're not into religion in the first place?!”

Tanya felt crushed. She didn't think that this could happen to her. Now she felt alone about caring about morals in sin, and alone in caring about morals not being everything there is to seeing value in things. Now, she felt, she regretted that she had ever eves-dropped on the four people on the table beside hers. ...

The Sincerity Issue

“What a smart-alec!” he burst out. The person he was talking about was his second-grade teacher. He was not aware of that his mother found it to be weird to insult her about being too much into smartness. “Honey,” she said, “she needs to be smart about what she has to teach you!”

“Oh! I don't mean that!” he answered. “I mean she's a smart-alec about how come the other kids might appreciate us for being sincere! It's not like we can't handle it about each other! It's just that she tells us there's no use in seeing them as one's friends unless we have deep sincere talks to each other!”

“So?” his mother asked him.

“So!” he answered, “she doesn't admit that we can be friends anyway! And the only thing she tells us is that we had to be sincere in order to get rid of the fighters among them!”

“What fighters?!” His mother looked puzzled.

“Oh, there in the other class, the one above us! Some of them keep picking on me and two other kids in our class! But it's not about sincerity mom! It's about that they can't find any reason to like not being superior, and thereby they want to keep fighting their so-called inferiors!”

She looked at her son. “I suppose you mean that sincerity would be out of place since they don't want to respect you enough to have to listen to you, then, right?”

“I sort of mean that mom! I mean that and that I don't find them superior when I doubt them as I would had I been more sincere about my situation about them!”

His mother looked troubled. “Oh my then, sonny! ... But why do you feel that she's being a smart-alec? I mean isn't she just into being wrong about them?!”

“She's into, mom, just pretending to be right about me, and about them! And she's into being right about me in a sense that she instructed me to pretend to be sincere - and then they only beat me up worse for it!”

His mother seemed to be taking this as a very bad thing of her. But she also seemed to fake, he thought, that she was feeling that he could be right, rather than that his teacher was. Thereby he didn't trust his mother about this, just like he hadn't when the two bullies from third grade started beating up on him and two others. “Mom, you're sincere only about that I've been beat up! Not about that I am being badly treated by my teacher!”

“I still want to say what I have to say to you! It's not she, it's them who are bullying! It's not - or at least hardly - she who can help, I think, that she's too stupid to understand that she's wrong about how to handle them! But yes, I think we can work something out against them, and perhaps I can have them be suspended from the school!”

“I can't believe there's any alternative to seeing them as the only trouble I have, although I find my teacher to be a trouble in herself! That's she who isn't sincere enough to say to me that she doesn't know for certain if there was sincerity missing with how I handled them before that talk to her. ...”

His mother sighed rather deeply. “Look, sonny, we can't get them suspended unless we also are nice to that teacher of yours!”

“I don't see any suspension as the absolute thing about them! It's not me who should argue with how they're suspended, be it from my teacher or not! It's not they who should be told to stay around in the first place! And therefore I think we should have them suspended even without talking to my teacher about them!”

She sighed deeply again. “I told you, sonny! I can't get them suspended unless we have the teachers sympathy for us!”

“Try, then,” he answered, “not to suspend the, but to just have them on retention for a while!” he didn't quite know what 'suspension' meant. He figured it must be some way of having them in prolonged retention or something like it.

Hi smother looked at him with a puzzled expression. “We can't just have them for retention!” she said at last. “What we need is to really have them expelled from that school of your!”

“Then what shall we do with them after that? There's no use in trying to convince them that we're all trying to ease tensions in the school! Devil in them will be retaliating fairly soon unless we have them many miles away from here!”

His sighed once more. “Sonny! What I mean with expelled, as well as with suspended, is exactly that they don't belong anywhere near the students they've been bullying! Now please let me call that teacher of yours, and let us discuss, sincerely, how come the three of them haven't been suspended earlier!” With that she seated herself beside the house-hold telephone, looked up a number, and called it.

Her son looked at her while she was doing it. He wondered if the harassment from his teacher really seemed like an embarrassment to her. It seemed so curiously smart to say to oneself that everything she does is too correct to be criticized. And there she was, his mother, calling her, and relying upon her, as if nothing had ever happened about her.

Two days later his teacher told him that she had gotten the three bullies suspended. He then felt that he was satisfied, but still wondered: How could there be any notion of there being potential, even, wrongs, in that teacher of his, when everything that aught to be correct always has to pass through her so-called better judgment in order to take effect?

“Thanks!” he still said to her. “Thanks a whole lot!”

The Evil Guy

“Don't you get it?” Amanda asked. “They're speaking as if they couldn't have stayed away from harassing him for only those apparent reasons! For the sake of seeming innocent they pretend it's equally bad to stay away from a loser as to pretend he - or that could be a she - aught to be crushed to the extent that whoever that is can't even speak for him- or herself!”

Her brother Charlie looked at her. “I consider it a nuisance to have to expose them as evil, although they seemingly are! I mean we could all get away with it as long as they don't seem to be treated too condescendingly to accept it from us! I mean it's they, not he, who - seemingly at least - have the Jesus potential in them!”

Amanda sighed over this. “It frightens me,” she said, “that you seem evil enough to just let it all go at that!”

Her brother scorned her by saying: “The nuisance in that they aren't good in reality isn't too much for anyone but those who are ridiculous in their ways of pretending it's everybody else who aught to be punished!”

She looked chocked. “But how come,” she asked him, “do they then seem to be innocent enough to actually fit into your picture of what is real in a moral sense?”

Charlie said: “Whatever you think I am for it, they don't have to be harassed - and that is neither by us, nor by the guy himself! We don't need to submit to blackmail, neither of them nor of ourselves, just because he has escaped from some of the blackmail he seemed to have against him!”

A bit nonplussed by her brother's attempt to cover up as innocence, the blackmail that those people were guilty of in the first place, Amanda searched for an answer. After a while she said: “Alright, then, you bastard! Perhaps we shouldn't care about him, but then also not about you very much, because, as you know, they have been blackmailing you as well as him - although not as intensely!”

“Are you sure about this?! I thought they would be feeling like being trustworthy for the people who care about them and let their blackmail be real by the look of it!”

“I assure you they haven't! But do you know what? I can ignore that you feel like pretending it's he and not they who should be blackmailed, to the extent you can expose for yourself that you don't have the guts to realize it when there's real evil about. To the extent you do that, we can stay together about what we're up against. To the extent you don't, I'll have to ask Eliza or someone to support me in my efforts to seem innocent about the way I will then handle that they blackmail you! I mean you have to realize that I can get it from my girlfriends, the support that I need in order to blackmail the kind of fellow who never would realize what evil really is!”

Her brother thoughtfully looked out through a window. “I feel,” he said at length, “that you and I should not be partners about all of this, and I can also blackmail both you and your girlfriends. Besides, I don't feel I am a partner for seeming innocent by harassing those who are actually cunning in seeming good for us all! Thereby it shall be you the two of them blackmail from now on!”

She looked a bit nonplussed again. But this time because she felt threatened. “There's no reason for me to believe I have to see myself as as evil as you guys. And you shouldn't believe I can forgive you, and much less can the girls you will be hanging out with, once they get to know what kind of an evil fellow you really are!” With that she ended the discussion, and saw to it that she thought of him as a fellow not to be bargained with again as the type of guy whom she would ever look up to.

Aspiring for a Good and Solid Partner for a Relationship

Looking at her boyfriend Stanley, Nina knew that she seemed to fit into the picture of what he wanted. Even so, she felt that he wanted to humiliate her. He, on his side, seemed, she thought, content in pretending that she never crossed his mind as anything but a sex object that was there for his lusts alone, and not for the sake of a family.

Nina was not pregnant. Nor had she been into pregnancy as what she should have with this dude. Still she wished he would aspire to build a family-like structure with her. He, meanwhile, seemed to aspire for her to be seemingly the kind of woman that never would suit a man who would try to build a family. Thereby, Nina could not feel that he shouldn't be put down, from his pedestal of seeming loyal to her and what she had conceived him and herself as.

Thinking about this, Nina tightened her shirt by expanding her chest, and thus ascending her breasts. She intended to disturb her boyfriends capability to ignore her, for the sake of seeming guilty enough to him for being the kinda temptation that he could feel a need for. She looked at him and even ascended her breasts as much as she was able to.

He looked at it. “It seems to me,” he said rather obnoxiously, “that you'll be trying to seduce me into finding your irresponsible attitude to be a small thing compared to that I can enjoy them tits of yours! But I'm not gonna fall for that now!”

“How come, then,” Nina asked him, “don't you feel like kissing me and say to me that I need to enjoy our relationship?” When saying it she emphasized her lips in a way that she supposed would seduce his mind at least a little bit more into being horny instead of angry with her.

He seemed to ignore her lips, and to her disappointment, he didn't seem even to think about sex as a possibility. To some extent he even seemed to be into seeing her as an ex whom he needed to ignore - perhaps in order to find himself attractive enough for the next woman to have. “I,” he said solemnly, “feel that you and I should not try to pretend this is going somewhere!”

“What do you mean?” She wondered if he thereby intended to end their relationship.

“I mean this quarrel isn't leading anywhere!”

Sighing with relief Nina looked at him and felt that she was superior. He was the one to be dumb enough to expect the quarrel to be all there is to it! Now, perhaps, she could seem to him to be into having the relationship continue, while at the same time exposing herself before other fellows.

She smiled smugly at him, and thought about her own body as the asset she would have for getting herself a new guy. She moved, however, a bit slowly towards him, in order to finally caress him. When she did, he seemed, she thought, to fall for it. But in order to make certain, she felt she needed to seduce him more thoroughly, and thereby she exposed her chest and the tits on it for him to see as though they were only there for him. “I love you!” she lied, because now she had decided not to love this fellow anymore, but just to seduce him, and make him happy for a while.

He looked at it. He began, then, to fondle her breasts. She thereby moaned, as if still excited by that it was he who did it. But, this time, her actual excitement sprung from that she figured this would expose her as a possibility for other partners as well. In order to keep him from seducing her back, she set her mind about him very much as the trivial man who thought he was a seducer. Thereby, she felt she could continue to think about other fellows, and perhaps she could have herself think about another girl instead of him, as well. Because doing so would reduce his capacity to see an actual betrayal in her, she figured, because she knew he was into viewing lesbian seduction as innocent compared to straight seduction.

But thinking about this, she realized that he could, quite possibly, soon be doing the same to her, if he found out what was on her mind. It seemed to her as a coincidence that she and not he was the one to seduce the other into not realizing that there could be a betrayal, soon, of the trust they had between them.

To him, however, it seemed that she was trivializing their behavior and attitudes towards each other, those that exposed their incapacity to stay together about having a relationship. Thereby he sort of didn't mind that she exposed herself as if for other fellows as well. In that he felt that way, he immediately repressed the thought of her as doing it for that sake. But this repression was the pitfall that would eventually make him seem inferior to her and her coming partners. ...

Recognition of the Female Gender in a Society for Male Statutes of Appreciation

“I feel we don't have to have any women here!” August said to Peter, who looked at him and wondered: “Why do you feel that they don't belong with us? You said yourself that you were heterosexual!”

“I feel that without them we can all come to terms with our aspirations and fortitudes!”

“And that with them close to us we couldn't?!”

“I mean that they disturb that notion about us that it is us that it is about! In their attempts to seduce us and so, they might otherwise trap us in cravings for their appreciation!”

“Do you mean we aught to pretend that they don't seem real or something?!”

“Yeah, that's what I mean!”

“I feel that they're not for real, but that we still have to have them around - for the sake of breaking with reality now and then!”

“Yeah,” August muttered. “Yeah, I feel that too! But the preliminary measure will still - I think - have to be to exclude them totally.”

“I think we should have some show girls there at least!”

“Show girls perhaps! But what if we run into trouble about excluding them at all, because they complain about our attitudes if they are let in only as that?”

Peter looked thoughtful. “No, I guess just might have to do without them in the beginning. ...”

“I'm not sure about only in the beginning, although I hope that!” Rather, I feel that we have to, perhaps, help one another fetch ourselves - each and every one of us - to fetch himself a girlfriend, or even a wife!”

Peter looked serious and screwed up his eyes a little, firstly looking towards the floor. Then he looked first at August and then downwards again. “Yes,” he said thoughtfully. “I suppose they can all need a girlfriend or wife.” Then he relaxed his eyes and looked at August again. “Do you feel, my dear friend, that we know if they all even want one?!”

“No, I don't know that. But let's suppose we all had girlfriends, one for each and everyone of us! Then we wouldn't have to see them as either inferior or superior. Neither would anyone of them! Thereby we would be without reason to doubt that everyone had a chance to get to know the other gender enough not to complain about that we exclude all females from this society of ours!”

“But how do think they'll react if we suddenly tell them they all aught to get into a relationship with some female? I mean I suppose some of the men really want to be single! Others of them could be gay! And some even both! How do suppose they will react to that proposition, that they all should get a girlfriend and that this society should thereby be closed to having female members?”

August sighed. “We're a smaller society than that that should have to be such a big deal. But we're growing! I think that we should, before we become twenty members or more, see to it that we can exclude all female memberships! I mean, I can exclude them one by one, and so can my son. But need to exclude them generally! We really can't handle them, except to the extent that they can prove their loyalty to us, in some way that doesn't fit in with their objectives of undermining our interests in tokens of care for order of male kind.”

Peter looked at him. “I can find it could be a good and necessary thing, then, to have it our type of accountability should thrive in this society, by doing that! But how can you - or I, without causing paranoia, propose that for the rest of the fellows?! I mean, we're already fifteen members, and growing, as you said. How can you be sure that all fifteen of us can stay away from having media cause a stir, or something?!”

“I can do that by pretending we're all into having women seem satisfied with being without us, and that we thereby should make them seem clear on that we should not pretend they want the society we have to have to be as smart as society as a whole. In this, they shall have an appreciation of male seclusion from the notion that we should have to participate as though we were entitled to never be alone and without them!”

“Okay! Then, I guess, I should never mention the thought of bringing showgirls there again, right?!”

“I'm not sure about it! But for now, and at least until we're finished with the transformation I just proposed, do stay away from mentioning it!”

“I feel, then, that we all should be having a clue to how we can get ourselves back to the refinements of female beauty, so that we all can appreciate them females just the same!”

“Haha!” August laughed at Peter. Then, in a more serious tone of voice, he added: “We all have to get used to the idea that we cannot appreciate ourselves as chauvinist pigs, since we need to be rid of their misconceptions of us as assholes, all of us!”

“Then how can we appreciate ourselves as being dainty enough about the gender that we do appreciate as being sex-symbol smart at treating us the way males want to be treated by them?!”

August almost laughed. “No! I doubt it that they will ever except that kind of notion to have about themselves! I mean women in general tend to view us as pigs as long as we're not trying to help them believe themselves to be appreciative of us as good fellows, although they're sometimes into pretending we should appreciate them just for their bodies!”

Peter looked a bit nonplussed. “I think we should show them that we like them as such! I thin we aught to show them our appreciation of them as showgirls, for instance! I know several girls and women who can prove that we do have female appreciation back with us for it if we do show them that!”

“Then how come society as a whole always tends to ridicule men who try to appreciate them like that?! Do you really find it in them, those females you mentioned, to be willing and able to correspond to culture in a way that would really change it into a sphere of appreciation for the female sex and male appreciation of that?!”

“I feel that you don't see that we have a society that could change if we had the guts to pretend as if something about these women's appreciation! And that they thereby will be able to change their standards about sex and morals, to the extent that we can live up to the norm of frivolous sex and freedom to have an appreciation of it!”

“I hope you come to your right mind tomorrow! Because tomorrow I will have to propose the change. I will also see to it that every member has an idea of what it is about. I believe that we will then together decide in favour of my proposition, and then also try to convince every member to accept it! ... I would perhaps see it in you to hinder that process! But you will in that case be suspended from membership! I will also perhaps expose what you seem to be after, so that you will have to fend for it yourself! Because we its way to risky for us to accept you to be piggy-backing on our society for it!”

A Routine Seduction

“This is a tedious party congress!” Leila said to her very recently befriended colleague Timothy. He was one of many whom she found that she fairly easily could address as if they were plausible as more important than the rest of the men around there. She knew that this could flatter just about everyone of them into finding her attractive, and thereby into conceiving her favour to be of importance. She was rather sophisticated in her manners about this; able to convey herself as the kind of person to have the right to be entertained and/or cared for as a fellow party member, more than any one else he knew about.

The man she just spoke to looked at her and answered: “Yeah! Me too! I guess it's a bit too tedious for us all!”

“I have a notion of that they won't mind,” she said, “if we have the competence to pretend as though we were supposed to be finding them less amusing than what they suppose they are.” She looked at him with an air of confidence.

He looked auspicious, and drew his breath with an air of hoping that the two of them would confide in each other privately or even intimately. “Let's go then, to the restaurant on the second floor! There, perhaps, we can find the atmosphere for relating to each other about how to take this topic to another level!”

She smiled at him. “I hoped you would say that!” she answered.

After a few minutes, the two of them sneaked out the congress hall and out into the lobby. They took an elevator to the second floor where they ordered a table for two. A waitress showed them a little table with some dainty grace to it. She said that someone would be back with a menu in just a few minutes.

They seated themselves and looked at each other. Leila then figured that he was a man with a spark pretending that he would be above his present career stage fairly soon. This she was very used to. Most of the guys she dated seemed to be that way. Smugly, thereby, she said: “They seem to be interested in feeling that we should sit here and be cozy about the atmosphere! Do you feel you and I should sit next to each other, or tease one another by looking each other in the face?” This she hoped would catch his interest only enough for there to be a notion about her in him as a good catch, so that she would more easily be able to catch a better fellow.

“I would very much like to sit here right beside each other!” he answered. “But since this is a public restaurant, I think we aught to keep on sitting on opposite sides of the table!”

“How come,” she asked him, “do you feel like sitting opposed to me when you don't feel like facing me as fitting enough for our party to say that I don't want to betray the confidence of an air of genteel value that suits our values?”

He looked at her and felt ashamed. Saying nothing he straightened his posture and then asked: “Do you feel like going somewhere afterwards, or shall we just call this a lunch without any issue of developing a relationship?”

“I feel like pretending as if nothing about that we were here, and thereby I don't feel like going somewhere afterwards!” she answered.

A male waiter arrived and gave them each a menu. She ordered a stake and he plaice. For drinks they both abstained from taking any beverages. He ordered soda and she juice.

“I feel, Timothy,” she said, “that there aren't any ways to confide in that we are into anything but attitude problems unless we both agree not to get involved too much with one another as though we were in league with those we have to despise but still look up to!”

He looked at her. “In that case, why did you bring me here in the first place?!”

“It's because they seem to be interested in there not being any possibility of at least some good intrigue against their possible imperfections!”

She looked at his face. He seemed to be confident that he would sooner or later be related to as good enough for such conspiracy. Thereby she had gotten him where she wanted him. She could assume, she felt, that he could be used as the spring board she might need for catching really powerful guys!